I said "I'm fine, I don't have much to say given the situation. It's nice that you're doing these things, I just don't have anything to add".
I'd have stopped at "...given the situation" lest you appear to be onboard with her useless & mindless wandering but if your tone wasn't bitter then yes, that was fine. She'd just use bitterness to say you aren't "growing", you know. If I were you, I'd shoot for indifference. And fake it til you make it.
Yeah, I have a few points of confusion on that whole exchange
Why did she ask me if I was 'ok'? Because I wasn't giving her the 'attention and enthusiasm' about her life that she needed? Did she expect me not to change my interactions with her after being told she was 'done'?
I almost said "you know, I'm fine I just don't care about your life any more, I'm almost relieved that I don't have to wonder if you meant it when you said you'd keep your commitment to help me through my stuff. Now I know the answer and since you're no longer my responsibility I'm so relieved it's over"
Later this evening I was in our room (ha, 'our room') and I walked up behind her and rubbed her shoulder, asking her if she was tight from working today. She says "Oh, have you stopped being mad at me now?" and I said "I wasn't mad, I just didn't have anything to say". She says 'ok' and starts talking about something else, now her tone is 'everything is all normal now'.
Still not sure what to say when she talks about her stuff. How do you detach and when she 'detects' the difference in your responses, how do you tell her that you're not mad, you just don't care about her 'adventures'? I mean, she's LEAVING. Doesn't she remember that small point?
