Hey, here's a thought. Maybe when you are offering to do something for W (like take the glass to the dishwasher) she sees that as a controlling behavior? I know lately my H keeps reminding me that I'm not his mother....so I quit doing his laundry and ironing...quit picking up after him...quit waiting on him...etc... I still make dinner, but if he's not around, we eat without him and put everything away so he has to dig through the fridge to find it. He's started loading his own dishes in the DW and washing clothes....and he absolutely sucks at ironing....it takes him forever!!!!!! Too bad for him!

BA

Me:43
H:48
M:24 yrs T: 26 yrs
2 kids
ILYNILWYA 8-07 - MOW 9-07
H moved out 8-2-08 Back 8-18-08
Affair continues
Back home but not emotionally