last week W said I was stalking her, so going into my house, which I pay for, is off limits, even if invited by my own kids.
Apologize for it seeming like you are stalking and tell her you never intended to do this and would never want her to feel uncomfortable. Ask her how she'd like to deal with the transfer of the kids. Stay away from the home. Avoid her. Just a friendly wave and smile if you see her looking out the window. Keep it non-emotional and business-like. No relationship or negative talk!!!
I think her reason for having the kids stay with her that weekend is she's probably trying to create the custody arrangement she'd like to have for the divorce. She will probably start being stricter about "your time" and "her time." Don't be angry. This is just the reality of divorce. Don't fight her on this, she will only use it as more reason to divorce you. Any fighting or anger will only validate what she's doing and that's the last thing you want to do.
There is no arriving, ever. It is all a continual becoming.
