na, I think that's what my H has in mind too, coming over every evening. When we discussed his not living here, he suggested that he come for dinner every night.
I said that I didn't think that would work for a very long time, because it would be sending a false message to the kids. It was not my intent in any way to use them as pawns or deprive them of time with their father - it's one thing, though, to have me wondering what it means that he spends so much time at the house and another to put the kids through that. After some sort of transition period, however long that would be - I think I would recognize the correct time when we arrived at it - I think I would set boundaries around the time.
I think it would get to that eventually as H gets busier in his 'new, improved' life. Having some sort of schedule in place would hopefully mean that the children would still see their father regularly and it's also a reasonable, logical consequence of choosing to remove oneself from the family home.
Anyway, I didn't say all this to my H, just the one sentence about the kids. I believe the realization that leaving would mean less time with his kids (duh!) is one factor in why he's still in the house.
