Stuck in Neutral - MN Man's 5th thread

[phbear316]

Morning MMan

Ok, i was trying to work the quote thing, but not working for me so

"Its no longer worth my time or energy."

Good start. You have to do things for you. YOU forgive her when YOU are ready, and keep in mind, you don't have to tell her. Its all about you and for you. I will take time, i know the time was right for me immediately, but sometimes i still find myself forgiving him on lots of things, each day. Its an ongoing process one you will take on when you are ready. Just remember you may not think so, but it does consume you the inability of not being able to forgive, for to forgive is to move on with you, to the next step of healing.

You cannot fix her honey, you cannot adjust her view of life right now, its way off center. You have to work on you. Things will all come into place in time.

Honey, the photo thing, You need to think about what you need to do about this. First off stop looking at her Match.com profile. You need to stop looking at this, it is like snooping you need to let go more in this department. I know the photos hurt. I understand. But I want you to step back for just one minute and think about this,

You have photos, beautiful ones of you and her on your profile here. How do you know that she does not know about them? Do you think that they may hurt her? You need to maybe think about taking them down, and replace them with some fabulous photos from you birthday. Photos are snapshots of our lives, good and loving times, and some times in the end all we have are photos. But some times they can be painful. I think right now constantly looking at her profile is just hurting you way too much. I think you need to do the just keep swimming or stop sign technique every time you want to go on her profile. Its hurting you to much.

You need to move on and away from her profile, please try to.

You said it before you cannot fix her, i cannot fix her, no one right now can. They just think they are right, and we are wrong and weak. But you know what, we are stronger just like your friend said, stronger than they know.

My h was around all weekend except for some time on sat night. I found him a few times looking at his phone, i am sure texting ow. I did notice on sunday, h was talking differently to me, being nice helping me, i even got a kiss on the cheek, and he went out of his way to help me with something on the computer i needed to do for work. Why? i would like to know, i have a theory, i was cleaning the house all day and did not put on my wedding ring. I think he saw this a break for him. I think when i wear it, it makes him feel guilty, and puts pressure on him like when is she going to get it, its over. Well today its back on. This is my choice, not his, i am not ready to take my ring off.

Just a observation, but for my trip next week he has not offered to take me to either my moms house or even to the airport. He told me i could long term part my vehicle at the airport. So see you cannot control what they do, for i would think taking me to my moms house, so we could take a car from there to the airport would be a nice thing to do. NOPE. I know he does not want to see my family. He cannot deal with that right now, and that is his issue and his alone. But come on, drop me off, holy cow, take a half hour out of you your day, she will wait for breakfast or what ever, you will have a week to play house with her. H would rather spend over $100 in long term parking then face a ride to my folk home, gosh H grow up. Maybe i will long term park, but for right now, its still my money in the checking account too, so i am really paying to for the parking when i don't and should not have to. GGRRRR.

Have a great day, I gotta run, going to be late for work.... Be back later on
bear