Cleaning out the Cobwebs

[peaceful_spirit]

Aud,
I understand exactly what you're feeling. Even the part about things being crazy on the home front.

First let me comment on that. In my case, I have been feeling really stressed about the kids, work, the messy house, all the paperwork, the laundry, etc... So, I spent yesterday organizing all the paperwork. I went to Staples and got new files and folders, etc... I have to say, once I organized it all, I felt much better. I also have a little notebook with a to-do list that I keep adding to as I remember things. I find that when I write things down, i feel less overwhelmed with the tasks at hand.

So, see if there's anything you can do in your own life to organize it or to bring order. Your kids being sick, you can't control, obviously... but of the things you can control, what can you do to make things easier on you?

Onto your feelings about your H. I get it. Believe me I do. I often struggle with my H's lack of faith. And that is something that you and i can't touch. Forcing religion on somebody will never work. We just have to hope that they find their faith on their own. I pray about it often.

No, you can't control your H. You can control you. But that is not always an easy concept to get. I have to remind myself of this everyday. At the same time, don't sacrifice your own needs in the M. Is your H receptive to your giving him feedback about how your needs are being met? If so, find a gentle way of telling him what you need in the M.

I know I said this before, but I really think your C can help you with waht your role is and how you should be communicating with your H. And maybe at some point, you can ask your H to join you with yoru C to talk about YOU, not about the M. THat might be a good way to at least get him into a session with you.

Hang in there. I can empathize. Really, I can.