Don't Push!!! A Newbies MUST Read.

[AliSuddenly]

Hi everyone...I'm new here the past few days, posted my story at MLC under http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubb...rue#Post1324947

I keep reading all these posts and I long for some sign of hope with my BF of 9 years, that some of you here have...some mixed messages, them still hanging around, still having contact...but he just went. Hes been absolutely resolute from day one, not a chink in his armour. Has anyone else experienced that? He says "I've made my decision and I'm never changing my mind". Its so distressing, he is literally like a brick wall, its awful.

He has never had a bad word to say about me or any complaints since he went odd on me in June, he says he honestly doesnt think its anything I've done, its about him and whats right for him. He said I dont want THIS anymore, when I say whats THIS, he says I dont want US anymore. I dont miss US as much as I should do. When I asked, why he says, cos I dont love you anymore.

So I cant do any 180 because he says its not about me? But if he left me...it must be about me on some level? Or is it really about them?? Its so confusing. Contact and asking why wasnt working, he was so guilt ridden and couldnt explain, so I have stopped it. I am posting becuase I think of texting him... but I guess I shouldnt? I havent for 2 weeks now, and not spoken to him for 3.

I worry that NC would just make him think I am fine, getting on with my life and getting over it, letting him go, which is daft as he has left me right! I spent the previous 2 months crying hysterically whenever we spoke, begging, pleading, made worse as he kept saying that he couldnt give me a reason and sorry that he couldnt explain.

Please, anyone out there...am I in whats known as Last Resort? Is this something to do with "going dark" on my partner? I worry that I should be doing the opposite, showing him how much I care, but I'm sure he was well aware of that before as I have been loving and attentive to him this past year.

So I guess I shouldnt contact him?

THankyou

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Me: 36
H: 34
T: 9 years
ILYBINILWY: 2 Nov 07
Moved out: 15 Nov 07