Walked out after 9 years

[AliSuddenly]

Gosh thankyou for replying...yes he told his best mate that he wants space and to give me space..as he doesnt think its right to contact me as he only upsets me when he does. Its killing me to not contact him. Its so wierd as we got on so well, I thought this was it for us. He even told me a year ago, "I've got no intentions of ever leaving you, you're the love of my life." He doesnt remember saying that of course. :-(

Does it really work though? It feels so alien to not contact him, its like I dont care. Some of his stuff is still here, so he will be contacting me soon to collect it, I'm sure...and what on earth do I say when he does??? I feel that I need to be prepared, or steel myself to not mess up when he does call. And then I think, thats crazy, thats playing games, hes already left, why not just be myself and tell him I miss him !?

He was working with a new girl in June on a big new project, and again in October before he left me. I know he called her outside of work once or twice... I have asked him about her several times, but he said hes not interested in her and its not about anyone else...but it does seem suspicious. Plus he is soooo guilty and resolute, it would point to someone else involved??

Does giving someone space really work then, or not always I guess. I've had some tough times in my life and been heartbroken twice before when I was younger, but nothing as awful as this.