1. Your wife is nearly not as crazy as she was 2 years ago. 2. She still likes your company. 3. You have plenty of time. She's not going anywhere soon.
I hear what you're saying. She has many friends who are going to help her 'find her path' and let frank go. She may not be physically leaving but I feel that as time goes on she will get the support she needs to help her feel comfortable in her decision. When she was having the affair she couldn't get that support, but this is different.
She's surrounded by people who want her to be happy, and to 'grow' spiritually. Anyone can see that I have been an impediment to that.
I successfully pushed her away. I know it was my way of punishing myself. I won, I guess.
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Just know yourself, find yourself, have fun, and share it with your wife because it's fun for you to do so. Put all your energy into yourself, not the relationship. As you regain yourself, your joy will bubble over and positively impact the relationship. Get your cup filled, then you can fill others.
I don't know what you're talking about, there is no 'relationship'. She's 'done' and she's getting the support she needs to leave because nobody else can say she didn't 'try'.
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You both seem more compassionate to each other now.
How can you say that, or more precisely, how does that help?
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Leave the pictures on the wall as they are.
Your worrying about the pictures means you are REALLY tempted to return to the "save your wife and fix the relationship" mode. You are looking for a strategy or an angle. Don't go there. She knows your game by now.
I was more in line with thinking about how I feel looking at them.
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Really surprise her by working on you.
How can we help you do that?
--Theoden
Help me to give up on my marriage. It's over and I destroyed it.