Yes MPT, I'm confused. And yes, I do want more opinions - yours definitely being one of them.
First, thanks to lowrob, wiley, and NOPkins for their comments - I'm pondering all of them at the moment. I realize they're somewhat different, but I actually agree with all of them to some extent. In reply to some of the points that NOPkins raised, I can't imagine going through the rest of my life without my wife. I'm tired of being miserable over our lack of intimacy, but by the same token I don't want to destroy our marriage. If I had to choose between a lifelong relationship with her without any hope of achieving the intimacy that I desire or no relationship with her at all, I'd choose to stay with her for the rest of my life. But the primary reason that I'm here is that I don't want to have to choose between the two. I'm just trying to find the best way to achieve the relationship that I want with my wife without losing her in the process.
With regard to "my latest plan" presented in my earlier thread, I think there's no doubt that I need to stop discussing the relationship with her, writing letters, asking her to read books, etc. I also think it might help to completely stop initiating anything physical. However, I'm not sure about avoiding or refusing goodbye kisses or about not saying "I love you" at the end of a call. Those things bother me a bit. Trying not to be alone with her and not calling unless I absolutely have to are also gray areas, although I don't think they're as potentially harmful as the other two. In short, I need all the advice I can get. My "plan" is by no means set in stone. I just want to do whatever has the best chance of helping.
