You have to feed the man first or you have effectively rendered him into a low status beggar rat in your own mind and killed your own sex drive.
I think this is true but for some reason despite my H's weak-puppy-please-be-a-cow thing, whenever I was nurturing cow in our early M he would rebuff me. Maybe he was rebuffing his own weak puppy. Or maybe I was reminding him of weak puppy when he was in another mode. I never did the cow thing in response to the puppy. Just has he is LD in the sack he is also somewhat LD of being fed, often leaves half the food on his plate, declines the proffered extra pork chop (in which case I would eat it). More weak and ailing puppy stuff? Too weak to even eat? In which case what WAS he looking for. Anyway he would most likely then go and find the ice-cream tub and polish the lot off without even bothering with a bowl.
What Fearless has said about her H wanting to be led but at the same time hating himself for needing to be led rings very true for me. Very much a no win situation. H: Be my leader, W: OK (dons mane etc), H: stop being so bossy, W: OK (dons bunny suit), H: (in whiny voice) Why do I always have to be the leader. Even despite him giving up the booze I'm still not sure he's the man for me.
Or should I just try to vibe strong bunny?
I don't even know where she hangs out anymore.
Fran
if we can be sufficient to ourselves, we need fear no entangling webs Erica Jong
