Living together as semi-polite strangers

[mishka422]

Well, I know you'll all look at me like a quitter and I suppose I am but I know my limits. H was waiting for me when I got home from work tonight. I walked into the bedroom to change clothes and he had all his boxes packed again and was ready to move out again. I didn't cry and weep this time, I told him exactly what I thought of him and his "coming home to work on our marriage" when we only saw each other for a couple of hours maximum these few days he was here and for the last two days he's spent his morning at OW house. I let him have it about exactly who he got to serve me the D papers today (a deputy friend of both of ours!), I told him what he had become is not a person but an emotionless machine and I can't deal with that.

I'm more and more convinced that God brought him home that quickly and just for a short time to give me a push to realize exactly what kind of misery he had been putting me through for so long that I had pushed aside because I was busy with life. It pushed me to make peace with the fact that he wants out of our M. I still can't figure out what I did to bring us to this point but I know for certain what he has done and I am going to remain strong for me and my son and not worry about my H.

I hate this. I'm still fairly convinced that he is in MLC but he is so exceptionally mean right now that he is like poison. I can't have that in our lives.

I know you'll all look at this like I'm giving up too quickly. Yes, the bomb was just dropped early December but this has been coming for a couple of years and I have been struggling one sided with our relationship for that long. I'm tired. He finally pushed it all over the edge. So be it.

I'll lurk around here and keep up with you all. I pray that all of your spouses find their way home out of the fog.

Love and best wishes to you all.

Michelle