I'm sorry, Sooner. I was really hoping you were going to have something good to report. I know you were too.
You sound like someone who needs a break. Why not go ahead and take one? Fulfill your responsibilities and continue to be kind. I know you will. But take care of yourself too. What about that hobby you mentioned taking up?
You're right about there only being so much you can do and the rest being up to your wife. I know it is hard to stop trying to "do" something that will lead to the desired behavior from your wife. But maybe it is time to be still. Sometimes things don't change until you become still and allow the other person to come to you. It would be different from what you have been doing. Hard, yes, I know.
My H told me he had learned to tell me what he was feeling or wanted and then to give me space. He said he had learned to trust me and that I would find my way to working it out, but that I couldn't be pushed into it. Maybe your wife needs a clear, non-angry, non-blaming statement from you about what you want and then the space to work it out on her own.
