More than just getting sex every once in a while (sometimes a damn long while!) or even more frequently I want my wife to feel passion for me again, to desire me, to hunger for our bodies and spirits to meld together in ardorous love, to connect. Like you I’m so hungry I’ll take whatever I can get (the reason why we can’t hold out until they initiate and then turn them down) but it is emotionally disappointing if she is not really connected, that is, deeply enjoying it (no pun intended) and considerably more pleasant afterwards. I’m almost afraid to have sex with her if it is not incredible for her because I know it is going to be a long time until we can try again. The space in between is the most uncomfortable.
I completely agree with you that the sex has to be passionate AND reasonably frequent, one extreme without the other is only halfway there.
