Kind of looked over a few of your posts. Detach, Detach, Detach! Of course as always it is easier said than done especially when you have kids. I always feel like I am walking on eggshells with H because I truly don't know who will show up at my door. It could be the nice H or the mean and brooding H. Who knows? What I do know is I hate the eggshell feeling and when I start thinking about it the easier it is to detach. I remember being a kid with a mom who worked really long days. Anyway, when she would come home the house had better be neat, dishes done, and dinner cooked, if not there would be hell to pay. Anyway, my siblings and I would laugh and joke it up until 5:30 and then around 5:30 we would all get really nervous and quiet and the tension would build cuz my mom would be walking through that door. That is how I felt with H. So even though I want my marriage to work I think about those times and how much I don't miss that. There is a peacefulness that I did not have in the later stages with H. I am not ready to trade that in. Funny story -I talked with MIL and she was complaining about H and his awful moods. I could not help but laugh thinking now she has to deal with the sh_t I had to deal with. Yeah, this detaching thing might not be as hard as I think, at least until I have another breakdown
Out of curiousity what did the OM do that landed him in jail. I ask because as a parent you are well within your rights to ask your W not to take your kids to jail. I think that is totally inappropiate. She needs to get a sitter or leave the kids with you or family or friends. Very bad judgement on her part-JMHO
