That is part of the reason I want to post is to show that there is some light at the end of the tunnel for some. It seems awkward at times when I read some of the other situations where the "evil" and the selfishness is beyond description.
I can tell you that I had some of that, I remember in October my W almost screamed at me and said I hate you when you look like that, and many other moments when I was shattered to say the least. The loneliness and the physical rejection could keep me up all night.
It is also why I so strongly suggest finding a soul mate or three from here or somewhere who understands the dynamics of all this. A friend or family member who has not been through it can never understand that a person can change so drastically. It really is so true that when you lie, you make the lie the truth and that by necessity makes the truth the lie. It also makes the good bad, since the good is part of the truth.
This it took me over 4 months to figure out, and still struggling to come to grips with it.
The above fact is probably why it will be very tough to deal with the OM again, I do see him all the time, and now just ignore him. He is not close to a tenth of the man I thought he was when we were friends.
I also know that the road is still long and there will be some severe bumps yet ahead.
This is helpful beyond description and if it gives one person or couple a glimmer of hope it is worth every one finger typo and more.
A huge Hug to everyone, I know how good and needed that can be
