I looked up another definition of courage from another source. It defines courage as "A man who attempts to fart when he knows he has diarrhea". Sometimes feelings defy definitions. My W, by your own definition, was able to summon mental strength to venture, persevere, and withstand danger, fear and difficulty. We see it as running away. They see it as running towards something better. Both parties could be right or wrong.
When I say I admired her courage, I was looking at it from her perspective. It's also what helped me look inside myself. I had to realize that I did have a part in her unhappiness. What was it about me that made her unhappy? Don't get me wrong, I didn't blame myself totally for her leaving, but I did realize that I contributed.
In my case, there was no OM. I really believe it was a MLC. in spite of her "altered" state, she remained a significant part of the kids lives. We shared custody, and pretty much divided things down the middle as far as the kids were concerned. So, in her case, there was some level of "sanity".
If there had been an OM, then I wouldn't necessarily have the same opinion I do now. I would then see it as cowardice. So maybe our interpretations of courage vary based on our situation.
MMF, I'm not telling anyone to admire their spouses for leaving them. I was just putting myself in my W's shoes for a moment. I think that as an LBS, we need to step outside of ourselves and look at things from another perspective. The view is amazing from the outside.
PoohBear
Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.
