FYI, lots of St Bernard’s spend too much time working and getting an education. Almost every guy I know that is D or has a troubled M, played his St Bernard too seriously.
Yeah, I think I have focussed on work and career the last 20 years out of a sense of professional insecurity. After having such a rocky start and getting laid off a couple of times, I've felt I had to overcompensate. Plus, knowing how important it was for W to be a stay-at-home mom, I thought that by focusing on being the bread winner I was meeting her needs. Maybe some, but not enough.
BTW, I'm really not a fan of the Marriage Builder's site. Exchanging needs inventories always seemed like a cold act of horse trading. "I'll do x, y, and Z if you'll have sex with me." How erotic.
It's so common to see someone give their spouse a questionnaire to fill out. Of course it rarely happens because the spouse doesn't want to see the one that you've filled out.
Actually the one thing that makes a lot of sense is eliminating Love Busters. And they have good advice for people dealing with affairs.
SM
"If we will be quiet and ready enough, we shall find compensation in every disappointment." Henry David Thoreau
