Confusion of a WAW (Thread 5)

Brushing her off or turning your back is definitely the wrong approach. I think that maybe you should try limiting you making the initial contact. You'll still have plenty of contact with her because of your D. I'm thinking of times like the other day when you were by her office and asked her to lunch. She accepted, but didn't really seem into it. Back off from those types of things for a bit and you might see the other times that you are with her become more positive.

You're right - We get plenty of time together as it is without finding other things to do. Lunch last week was pretty weird - She seemed into going, but didn't want to eat when we got there.

Again, this is just something to try. If it doesn't work, then go back to what you were doing since it doesn't seem to make your situation any worse. It seems like you are doing more of the same lately and are getting the same results which aren't always positive. That's just my take on things though.

I get very inconsistent results recently - This weekend we spent a lot of time together, and it was pretty positive. Not as good as they have been in the past, but they were better than around New Year. I think a lot of it with W has to do with routine changes and ups and downs with D - We had a pretty consistent two months when things were smooth, and now it's all kind of out of whack. I'm not really sure how much of it has to do with me, and how much has to do with other things - We can go most of a week without seeing each other (as we did around New Year), and when we get together it'll be miserable. Last night seemed like an exception - While the conversation was stressful, it was the first time since Christmas Day W has really talked to me a lot about how she feels and what is on her mind. I always take her talking to me to be a positive thing, if nothing else that it helps her process her thoughts.

Also, I think that you really need to weigh the risk versus reward of living with your W if she's not ready. It has the potential to be a huge backslide, but on the flip side it could be the breakthrough that you need. I think that you're the only one that can make that assessment. Definitely put some careful thought into it.

I think if I absolutely follow the line, avoid pressure and setting expectations, it won't necessarily be negative. W has been 'out of sorts' for a couple of weeks - Long before this topic came up for conversation. I really don't know what to attribute it to, but if I do something positive or negative, W doesn't seem to respond in any particular way to me.

I guess we'll see what happens. W is having a really tough night with D, so she's been talking to me a lot and I've been trying to take some of the stress out of it for her. I think she's a little overwhelmed with it all - She's not watched D when she is sick for a long time, so this is all kind of new to her.