All easier said than done but its the only way forward that I see and even then may be a game that I dont want to win.
Dave, I don't think I'm saying anything you don't already know, but... This is the key question. Michele doesn't really talk about it much in DR, but really, once you detach and GAL, the most important thing to do is dig deep and try to come to terms with the fact that something was/is missing from your life. Otherwise, the R would not have gotten to where it did.
I just don't see a whole lot of sitches where there were 2 (emotionally) healthy, married people with communication problems and all of a sudden, one was a WAS. Many more where there was something under the surface which caused a disfunctional relationship to develop, then leading to a WAS.
The question is, what is missing? In my case, my W's depression, NMA, caused me to spiral into a similar NMA, at least whenever I was around her. She saw that I was happy, except when I was with her and basically treated being married to her as an obligation and a burden (which it was). I definitely don't want back into that R and also don't see any effort on her part to address her issues.
Have you really thought this through at this level? If not, spend your time on asking some hard questions along these lines. If so, love to hear your conclusions!
Take care, my antipodal friend!
SD
Me 41 W 41 Kids: S9 S7 Married 16 years Bomb dropped 2/2/07 Still living together! current thread
