oops, backslid a bit this morning. my H contacted me for the first time on the Skype IM . I got to see his full profile and pic. It is of course with a pretty girl and of course I asked. strange convo. he was still drunk from a night out. it is not his gf.... then how sad to have to use her pic on Skype. he said he had 100s with different woman and did I want to see them all (jokingly). I was so dumb to get sucked into all of that dynamic. I said I was just curious- esp since I love psychology. (he got that hint) he said he doesnt choose he is a free spirit .... ongoing theme... I told him I beleive that even being a "free sprit" is a clear choice in my opinion. (i know, i know, i should have just acted as if or whatever)
i handled it fine and turned on the charm but we kept slipping into volitile topics. i think it is the virtual aspect. In the end it was ok. I am ok with the whole thing.
I mean , honestly I think it is sad and pathetic. i am not jealous what I am is discouraged. he is just so messed up . it makes me wonder why I bother to hope. and it is kinda sad to see him reduced to this. he is such an amazing guy and has so much to give and there is now the vomitting drunken party animal that has to show off pics to anyone (he was in Skypeme mode where anyone can contact him in the world) . t is like he needed that pic of him and that girl to make him interesting to others. Ah well.
Sorry for the toxic rant but it just got to me.
Things here are great. I got a fancy pink cell phone and saw my apartment yesterday. I am excited .
ok, off to orientation at work.
brava
Me: 36 He: 34 no kids Married: 2000 He left: July 05
