Everyone (& trytoohard), Thanks for that uplifting post, you sound like you have come full circle since the beginging of your H's MLC. I admire people like you. I unfortunately have had trouble accepting that I need to get a life. I have always felt truely at peace with myself and felt like I have become a person I wanted to become through years of hard work and determination. I feel like I have more of a life than most all the people that I know and usually talk to. I have strived hard at college/grad school for 9 years to get to where I want to be. I have coached cheerleading teams for almost 9 years now also (which is basically like a full time job, after I am done with work). I have always enjoyed working out and going for walks and things like kickboxing.I am on a bowling league and play darts alot. I have learned to remodeled just about every room there is in a house (due to fixing up the three houses H & I have lived in), I am even capable to do roofing. I love and teach a high ropes climbing course called "project adventure" over my summer days. I go out every weekend (and some weeknights) to visit with friends-(we are all so close that we even do holidays and vacations and hobbies all together). I have picked up reading, and have always done crafts of all sorts(especially cross-stitching). I like to travel,go camping, go to the beach and go on wine tours.I feel that I am the adventurous type that just loves to experience life allready. I don't know how much more I have to do to GAL, since I allready feel that my life is very full and great. I just can't believe that H doesn't want anything to do with that life anymore. H and I used to do a lot of these things together. But now that he can't face anyone, he seems to hate all of the parts to our old life. My H has always been the type to start something and never finish it (he barely finished h.s., and dropped out of college, dropped out of drum core{that he loved and did for years} and several sports, he switched careers from being a cook, an automechanic, a car salesman, a painter{1st sm. business attempt}, a construction business owner {2nd small business attempt-went bankrupt}, & now he is starting the 3rd sm. business attempt of opening his own auto shop). His father was very much the same. If anything, he needs to be the one to get a life, while I continue doing the many things I love to do (just now I am all alone doing them). I guess this is also one of the reasons, that I want to still go to this black tie affair with my friend. To me, there isn't much more I can do to get a life. I think that this is the type of event I can enjoy and have not been able to do since h.s. proms. I know I have a long ways to go yet in terms of learning and growing, but I will continue to do my GAL activities all alone which is so sad to me. I miss my husband and lover, TIPPER p.s. Question: For anyone who has had a spouse come and go multiple times, how long were your times apart compared to the amount of time they came back (i know everones situation is different, but I am just curious)?
