I have a question for you concerning your sexcapades w/ your H all the while he was still w/ OW....during or after the act did you ever iniate any ILYs?? Or was the sex (on your part) "acting casually detached"?
I want to go back to that point w/ my H b/c i believe NOW we kept that connection that now seems to be soooo distant since I stopped it from happening. I was good at it at one point where HE made it seem like *I* was using him for sex.
I want to know how you did it..so as not to get too emotionally close during the whole act.Did you wait for him to verbally open up to you or did you ever iniate those touchy feely convos.?
Chicki,
I waited for him. I never said ILY, I never initiated any relationship talks. I let him lead the way on that. For a long time we were just "friends with benefits" or "f--- buddies".
Not getting emotionally close - can't tell you how to do it. Not something that you can really tell someone how to do, just something you can either do or you can't.
If you can't I wouldn't recommend the sex thing. Too hard for most people.
It was hard for me a lot of times. Esp. toward the end when I could feel him moving closer to me. I started wanting more. More than just sex and then watch him get up, get dressed and leave.
but, to answer your questions, I kept it purely physical and just about two people doing something that felt good.
BFM
There is only one person who could ever make you happy, and that person is you. David Burns, Intimate Connections
