One day at a time seems to be working just fine

[butterflymom]

Chicki - I'll go check it out. Thanks for letting me know.

TRUSTING - yes, he did bring OW around our kids. A lot. A lot more than I was ever comfortable with. At first I tried to stop it, but quickly realized that I could not control his actions and that legally, unless she was some sort of danger to my kids (which she was not) that basically there was nothing I could do.

Once I accepted that, I was fortunate in that FW and I were always able to talk things through. I did not want the kids to know what their dad was doing. I just felt they were too young (9 and 5) to understand and i was afraid of the effect it would have on his relationship with our D9 (I was afraid she would feel compelled to choose and guilty if she like OW because of her not wanting to go against her mother) He came up with the "solution" that OW was just a "roommate" just a "friend" that was helping him pay rent and slept downstairs on the futon.

My kids never knew the true nature of their relationship and may never know now that we are together again.

I hated it. I hated that she bought them clothes, I hated that she and my D painted their fingernails together, I hated that she baked cookies and decorated cakes, and did other stuff with them. Absolutely tore me up inside. Hated every minute of it, but I said nothing to FW or to my kids.

I seethed in silent anger over it (most of the time).

I basically accepted that there was nothing I could do and prayed a lot about it.

BFM