Wife in Major MLC...Looking to Vent

[Jack_Three_Beans]

Good morning,

I hope that the way you post here is only here. I am no stranger to sarcasm, and understand its place when venting here. What I hope is that your sarcasm is not flavoring your validations with her. Something to keep in mind while you do this.

It took me a minute to digest this, but then I realized how I broke her heart: by confronting her over her EA several weeks ago. Apparently, expressing my discomfort over her "friendship" was enough to break her heart. Okay, fine. But if that "breaks her heart", doesn't that make it more than a friendship?

Bomb,

You want a classic example of not communicating?

Print the above quote out and paste it somewhere.

Now, point in fact I am only going off of what you wrote. But I can only do that here, right?

You have this perfect opportunity:

Finally, after a long pause, she looks at me straight in the eye and says:

"You broke my heart."
"And I don't know if it can be fixed."

But rather than asking, "How did I do that?"

You make the asssumption of what you did.

Not rising to her bait, I am amazed at your calm, but not so much with the assumptions.

Are you right? Probably, hell man I am not there. But you didn't ask. You really don't know what she is thinking.

You should have asked.

We stare at each other. Finally, she gets noticeably irritated at my refusal to jump into the hole with her and says "TALK!"

Me: "I think these would all be good things to bring up at MC tomorrow."

We say No R talks here. What we should say is YOU don't bring up the R talks.

I made a deal with my wife when we started talking again.

"I'm not going to say anything on purpose to hurt you, if somethiing can be taken the wrong way, please think about it first, and understand that I am trying to talk very carefully and not offensively, maybe we can both do that, and maybe we can both actually hear and listen to what we are saying to each other."


I hope MC goes well for you.