The weird thing is, when we had conception sex, it was really quite good. I remember trying to get PG. That was some good sex! Truely "baby batter" time.
Thanks for checking in, Lil and Lou.
Yes, Lou, it was good, and I tend to get resentful when I look back on that period. I get thoughts of "You were able to Just Do It when there was something in it that was really important to you, i.e., making babies. But when it is important to me, you couldn't be bothered." OTOH, I think it points to one of the emotional issues that my wife has with sex. It might have been a lot easier for her to give herself permission to "do the dirty deed" when we were making babies. If she has deep seated, unconscious inhibitions against sex, if she experiences vague feelings that being sexual is wrong, then the drive to have babies probably overcame those feelings easily.
One time when I brought up the subject of trying to rekindle a SL, she asked me "Do you want to have sex with me even though I don't want it?" it really stopped me. No, I don't want duty sex. And the look in her eyes told me that there is real terror for her in the very idea of me having sex with her. Like I would be raping her.
Lots of work to do. We'll see.
SM
"If we will be quiet and ready enough, we shall find compensation in every disappointment." Henry David Thoreau
Truely "baby batter" time. 
