The New Adventures of Supermom...Part 3

[JennyF]

First of all...Lizzy I second that regarding Brit's advice!

As Lizzy said, my own experience of parenting with my WAS is more than likely the exception, rather than the norm. My advice is probably close to worthless

Brit...not even close. You always give me something to think about and the male opinion is always helpful too. I am so grateful for your thoughts.

I agree - It is one thing leaving us; it's something else entirely leaving the family.

In the middle of our custody conversation yesterday H actually said to me, "I left YOU, I didn't leave them [kids]". He does not perceive that he left his family because he doesn't see himself as abandoning his kids. His perception of himself and what he's done is SO distorted.

I wouldn't think of it as you losing time with your kids. You DO need time to yourself, and it's important that you have a life outside of your children.

This is good advice Brit and you're right. I still have "the just gave birth a few months ago" attachment thing going. I feel a real strong motherly instinct to hold them close to me and not let them go. Especially my S because of the circumstances under which he not only got me pregnant, but the way he treated me through my whole pregnancy. He wasn't concerned for S then....and I'm just supposed to hand him over to Daddy dearest? Feels so unnatural.
Having said that I do not want to keep my kids from their Dad. Not at all. And I do need time to myself. But it's accepting the reality of that time truly being alone. I know I know...GAL. I'm working on it.

Thanks again Brit!
J~