the financially dependent spouse in MLC

[forward]

No, Tipper, H has been chronically underemployed. He could live on what he makes but with my income, H had a nice lifestyle and now? Not so much! He is going to have to cut back and I have not seen him do that.

Of course, that is my fault, too.

Means H should be making choices and H doesn't want to compromise. It is not "his fault" as his path does not pay well; however, he has not sought alternatives or chosen to build skills. The other option, of course, is to be OK with where you are and live modestly. But H just sat and complained about how hard life is on him and how unfair everything is. Didn't want to build skills but did want the $.

The message I get is "I want you to be responsible so I don't have to be."

I'm done with being responsible and I am spending irresponsibly!

(Well, not really, but I have certainly been able to lighten up in a big way!!)

That said, if we D, I will downsize my life substantially. House is too big and difficult to keep up by myself.

I believe H has noticed & is probably resentful, but hey, I worked my @ss off to build my career while he did exactly what he wanted to do.

No men posting about their wives here????