Thanks Blindsided. Here it is Saturday, we both don't have our other kids and I am sure he is sitting at home watching football. He has text'd a few times today 'just checking in on me'. How kind. But no move to spend time together. This is why I think that was just crap words to keep the communication going for the baby and keep him in my good graces.
I love this weather. Times like this when I would love to hang out by the fire and cuddle and stay warm like we used to do. Not anymore.
Me: 46 FWS: 36 Married and Divorced 4/07, Pregnant 7/07,False R 7/07 Baby Girl born 3/08 Kicked him out because OW: 7/08 5/10 He realized what he had and lost. Moved home! REMARRIED 3/14/11!!
Did I mention yesterday that he was doing his usual weekend drinking? When we did speak I could tell he was. Hit me over the head and remind me why I want him? When we spoke on the phone, I got that yucky he's drinking feeling. Maybe this is better that he is not around. I guess I start to have more feelings for him during the week when he is sober, because the weekend drinking sucked.
Me: 46 FWS: 36 Married and Divorced 4/07, Pregnant 7/07,False R 7/07 Baby Girl born 3/08 Kicked him out because OW: 7/08 5/10 He realized what he had and lost. Moved home! REMARRIED 3/14/11!!
H: Can you loan me $60.00? I can't make rent. Me: I can't. Sorry. H: It's ok. I still love you.
Gee thanks. I have loaned him so much money in the past and I am sick of it. No more. Especially with things the way they are.
Me: 46 FWS: 36 Married and Divorced 4/07, Pregnant 7/07,False R 7/07 Baby Girl born 3/08 Kicked him out because OW: 7/08 5/10 He realized what he had and lost. Moved home! REMARRIED 3/14/11!!
Funny you should say that. My H asked me to buy something he needed and he'd pay me back. This was last night. Everything is up and down. H got really upset when I wouldn't tell him where I was last night. Again, suggesting that I was on a date and that he didn't care just wanted to know where the mother of his child and child are. Uh, well if you were so concerned, maybe you'de be home with us. Last night I felt kinda good that he cared. Not today. It's the same old BS. It doesn't change anything. Just hang in there. Something has to change.
M 5yrs 1st baby-girl born 6/18/08 Bomb: 10/13/07 OW - I was 6wks Prego H Moved in w/OW: 11/2/07 D Final 07/10 OW had his baby 3/17/09-so her Me, now - happier than I ever was with him
Well, I am off to watch football and have lunch with him. Part of me doesn't even want to go. I can't read his motives yet and am afraid to let my guard down. Another thing is I am plain pissed off at him...I am pissed about all of the hurt and pain he has caused over the last year and a half. Maybe that is a good place for me to be. But how do I act cheery and so happy to be with him when I just want to yell and scream?
I will post when I get back.
Me: 46 FWS: 36 Married and Divorced 4/07, Pregnant 7/07,False R 7/07 Baby Girl born 3/08 Kicked him out because OW: 7/08 5/10 He realized what he had and lost. Moved home! REMARRIED 3/14/11!!
