Funny thing about Housework, MONTHS ago when this first started I did EVERYTHING. Washed Dishes, vacuumed, cleaned house, washed her car, all of the yard work and washed OUR clothes. (Didn’t mind this it was the only time I saw her panties ) Anyway At the time I was dirt, I mean W would not even want to be in the same room with me. We went out on one "date" and it was like going out it your X wife that remarried. Anyway this was the start of my detaching. I cut off a majority of the "help" (that I didn't consider help I thought it was a shared responsibility). Even though I did not do it for approval (at least not consciously) I NEVER got a thank you. Anyway Instead of doing things I started to wait to be asked or I would ask if she needed help. This has been going on for 7 months now. (Still have not washed her car).
Last weekend I made some beef jerky and W told me that she would clean up my mess. WHAT?? She would not lift a finger to help me before after all I was the one in the way of her and her married lover from being together........ I said sure thanks.... Then yesterday W was out and the dishes in the dishwasher were clean so I put them away.... When W came home she opened up the washer and said "Oh you put the dishes away already?" I said "Ya" she said "thanks". I don't know if you received my E-mail but you and I have allot in common. I know it is hard. It's been 9 months since I discovered the A. It's been 8 1/2 months since I had enough evidence (phone longs, addresses of his work and home. Addresses of his "hang outs' Naked pictures of him and W that I could have used to destroy his life. BUT............ like drz and myself have said......We have plenty of time...I could have ended MY misery months ago. My son and family would still be hurting but mine would have been over. But I waited. And things are 100% better now. They are not right yet but they are allot better. You can file anytime. It's like what I used to tell my daughters. You can do ANYTHING you want. Get pregnant, Rob a bank, have an affair..... But once you do it there is no turning back. I still have the option of ruining the OM and ending my marriage. I will ALWAYS have that option until I use it. You will know when it is time. The closer I get to my Vegas get away to close my W seems to be getting to me. Why??? I don't know, I don't care. Maybe she thinks I am going to see somebody. Am I? I don't know that option is open. Don't rush the Affair did not happen over night. (Well it may have happened overnight but what I mean is that what lead up to it didn't. So the road back won't happen over night either .
Husband
Last edited by husband; 01/06/0801:22 PM.
And if I claim to be a wise man, well It surely means that I don't know
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