Question about MLC and MLC'ers desire to help

[mymonkeybug]

OK after being here for a couple weeks now and getting one of Michelle's books and reading my ars off I have come to the realization that my WAS is doing the MLC and probably a bit of depression also.

Now my questions are as follows:

He wants to still be called whenever I need something for instance an oil change or hauling of fire wood or fixing things around the house, even when I need him to talk to the kids when I am having trouble handling their breakdowns over him leaving(S8 and D5). He also wants to be involved still in parent teacher conferences and field trips and all that happy family stuff like wrestling tournaments-he suggested we ride to them together and wants to come here every night to put the kids to bed. The kids going to bed I told him I simply couldn't allow because I felt it would be giving them false hope and that I couldn't handle feeling my heart break in rewind every night when he leaves out the door again. And since I haven't let him come to put them to bed, he has developed more of a social life so did it backfire on me? Did I wind up giving him the freedom he needed to get OW or whatever he may or may not be doing? So do I allow him to still be this involved and do all these things and call him for everything he wants me to although he choose to walk out on us and swears he is happier being away and ILYBNILWY?

Also, should we write up a parenting agreement? He has agreed to doing it and swears he will still pay ALL bills as he has with his income since I just now went back to work part time a couple months ago now that both kids are in school all day. I worry that he may at any point go back on his word and wipe out the bank account or cancel my card, etc...then how do I pay the mortgage and the electricity, and the other household expenses. Family keeps telling me to hire an attorney and file for seperation but in my opinion that would be rocking the boat and I don't want to do that if things are fairly civil between us so far.

And how the hell do I stop myself from calling him and texting him to talk about this situation? All I want to do is talk to him about it as if I am trying to guilt him into coming home. I know wrong thing to do. I need to call someone else when the urge strikes me to call him...lol. It would probably work. I even sent him a text tonight asking him if we could sleep together just one last time and of course his reply was no. Talk about crushing, of course not any more so than anything else he has said and done these last couple weeks.

Thanks for your opinions!!!