Melting the ice without resentment.

[Baltoman]

I've been reading NMMNG and trying to incorporate not allowing my W's brushoffs to annoy or upset me. So this morning we are laying in bed and I was caressing her. Sometimes she gets annoyed that I like to move my hands and feel her skin rather than just hold her still. She grabbed my hand and held it in place so I asked her what was up. She said she doesn't always like me to touch her that way. In the past I would have been a bit hurt by this but this time I simply smiled, kissed her, and said "Hmmm, I guess you married poorly. Must suck to be you." She didn't get angry and actually I did not feel any resentment or anger. I have no idea if this type of reaction will have any effect on her but I felt good about it. I guess that is the point of NMMNG. Simply know what you want and act on it without concern for the outcome. I guess I'll see if this approach works or not but even if it doesn't work for her I will just be happy if it works for me.