I honestly don't know what to tell you. I was never in the position where I was wanting sex/emotional intimacy and had a H that didn't want it / wouldn't give it to me. There are others here that have been there and may have other advice for you.

It's going to be your choice in the end most likely though to either live w/ it or tell him you WON'T live w/ it (and mean it) and see how he reacts and if he is willing to change. Have you gotten the SSM book yet? I would at least read that before you give any ultimatums and, like I said, you need to honestly mean that you are willing to leave if he won't change.

Me: 38
H: 35
S4, S5, S10
Bomb 01/07
Wanted D - nothing would change his mind
Numerous A's prior to D bomb; EA prior/during D bomb
Piecing 04/07
Deployed for a year 05/07
Still Piecing 2010
M 11 yrs 05/10