Great philosophy on schooling and class size. I agree completely.
Well, I went to my family C and we spent half the session coming up with a game plan for my new business venture. My C is very business savy and it's fun that he is very optimistic about my future endeavors. (well, that is what I pay him for, right? )
While I was in the session, XH texted me THREE times. My S left his gym bag full of his basketball clothes in his dad's car last night. My C if ten minutes from XH's shop. XH agreed to meet me. WEll, I AGREED to meet him, let's say..lol
He was so impatient about meeting times you would think he had to go to meet the president for lunch..He was so uptight. When I met him he looked good and was with our mutual friend..they were going to lunch. Mutual friend works for XH. XH really looks the best he has looked since he left. We talked for a while..engaged in brief chit chat. I talked mostly as I haven't seen our friend in months. It was awkward and familiar at the same time.
I can tell XH is cycling again. It's so strange. I can almost predict how he will act week to week. I just can't believe I lived with that for 13 years.
Holidays are funny as they are a time for reflection. I think alot of the reflecting is not only about visiting relatives and reliving traditions, but it's getting out all the memorablia from holiday's past, etc. Even the cleaning gets me nostalgic as I find so many lost things when I am digging through closets, old boxes, etc looking for holiday decorations or cleaning for guests.
Yesterday I came across one of our wedding videos. This was an amateur one that XH did himself with the help of his brother. It had our rehearsal dinner on it and karaoke at a bar afterwards. It was fun to watch the reception and see all the relatives that have since passed. I saw my aunt on the tape and it was bittersweet to visit with her once again as it has barely been two years since her sudden passing.
Anyway, it was intersting to see XH's body language and demeanor back then. It was good to see us as a couple, too and remember the good times. He truly was a different man back then; attentive, caring, funny, creative...The look in his eyes was even different.
My demeanor has changed, too, I did notice. I was dancing up a storm at my wedding which I thought was funny. I have since calmed down a bit and tend to be more reserved which my kids thought was funny. I spent most of the reception dancing with my friends and noticed XH was not around much. Funny..I didn't seem to even care..
Had I had a crystal ball..lol
I did tell XH that the kids were watching the video. He looked surprised and intrigued.
They were good times and I think it was fun for the kids to see us having fun..They laughed so hard at all the bad 90's hairdos, too.
Well, I am exhausted today because I do think that trip down memory lane took its toll on me. I was a little sad later on in the night and was like, "what the heck happened to that couple?"
Today, I accepted it. It's life. This stuff happens. I am grateful to have two beautiful kids, a great family, wonderful friends..terrific new guy. And that was that.
Now it's time to make an appointment with my couch for a nap. I haven't done that in AGES and it's time to sit back and smell the roses a bit..
)
