She's ready to move on

[Michael Mc C]

You know, prior to really thinking about how she has taken advantage of our current living arrangements (some time earlier this week I guess it was) I asked her to join me for sushi on Friday (today, the 4 month anniversary of our sitch oddly enough).

She looked a bit taken aback by it and asked what I had in mind. I mentioned her favorite place (mine too) and thought her reaction was a good sign.

Then she said: "With who? M and J (brother and his GF)?"

I said "No, I thought the two of us could go out and grab some dinner together."

She didn't respond, she just nodded her head slowly with the "deer in the headlights" look (the nod was not a "yes" nod). Since I was leaving for the gym, I let it drop.

So I went to the gym, a bit angry, and came home and calmly retracted the offer. She asked why and I told her that I guess I didn't know what I was thinking.

So... I know that her accepting a dinner invitation from me would have been a big, awkward step for her to take. I guess I shouldn't take it personally but still, it pissed me off a bit.

I'm not sure if I should have retracted the offer. Since she never really responded I decided it was a) too soon, b) an idiotic move on my part c) looking as if I was trying to rekindle romance and d) pursuing. Cancelling, however, may look indecisive and wishy-washy.

I don't care too much about it now. I have learned that when (if) she is ready to spend ANY time with me, she will need to initiate it. I think I may have succeeded in giving her the message that I don't need this relationship to work.

I could have told her to take some time to think about it I guess but to me that would be as if I was asking her for a favor.