Hi NikKiny and welcome to friends who understand your fears.
My W cheated on me 14 years ago and I forgave her (or so I thought). Many questions and issues remained unresolved as we 'got on with life' happily (or so I thought). Now my W wants to S because she has been unhappy for years. My word of advice, you cannot move onto to better times without settling the present issues as to why the A occured in the first place. What was OW offering that you wern't? These are the harsh realities but get them sorted now, painful as they will be, in order to have firm foundations on which to build a renewed M relationship with H.
You will find many words of wisdom here from people who have survived worse experiences than me. Keep posting and you will get the support! Take care.
