While I very much agree with the philosophy of GAL, I tend to also agree with what TOH is saying -- one can GAL and change one's self only so far before it becomes reckless and an endangerment to what we are hoping to accomplish, especially when there are children involved. Otherwise, our children get to witness both of their parents acting like self-centered fools.
In my own case, my W has been so persistent at painting any action of mine as negative, that much of my GAL appear to have actually back-fired. My W acts as if my taking the focus of of her drama or the kids is just evidence that I am being purely selfish, thinking only of myself. She makes comments about my GAL activities as me continuing to be cold and selfish. (Yeah, sure, while she, on the other hand, is so giving that she gives herself to the OM. Nah, she couldn't possibly be selfish, right?)
