I Was Almost A WAW....Still (Next Thread)

[sandi2]

Lillieperl, thanks for your concern. I am thinking that after this time, I will file seperate taxes. I don't know if that will make a difference or not, but like you said he is not going to change. He is dragging me down with him. I have stayed out of his "business" and let him take care of it, even when he had to borrow money from the bank against my wishes, I knew he had to deal with it the best way he could. However, I did not know until after the fact that the cars had been used for collateral on a note and that was why we couldn't get rid of them.

As I've told you before, in my heart I am independent, but in our M he is over me (according to the church) so I have to do what he says. That is hard for me! He doesn't abuse me or anything like that. He has been understanding about the Fibromyalgia (he wasn't for the first nine years, but he is now). He doesn't complain when I don't cook and things like that.....I've already told all this...so hush Sandi! What I'm saying is that he is not a bad person, but it is this type of crap that drives me crazy!

Having you and the others here on the board helps me to vent out my frustrations and save my sanity. It also helps very much to realize that I might actually have a legitimate reason to feel the way I do and that it is not all just "me" as my H would like for me to think! I would love to be able to do every thing you have told me to do! Really! But it isn't that simple. However, it is giving me some things to think about.

Read what I posted to imLin about the dog. I don't want to make things worse for the dog and if GS gets angry enough, he could take him somewhere else to keep that would be a lot worse than what he has here. At least we do take care of him. I just hate to see it in a cage. An animal like that should be free to run and play.

Thanks for listening to me. I hope I don't disgust you to the point of giving up on me. It's not that I don't have the spunk to do what you suggested.....but that spunk has gotten me into trouble in the past and has caused me to slow down quite a bit before I act on anything.