Hi Tipper, I'm so sorry for the pain and confusion you are experiencing but you are in the right place.

As far as the friend thing goes, treat him like you would treat a friend that has hurt you like he did. Have you ever been friends with someone who hurt you or was otherwise insensitive? How did you treat that person? I told my H when he told me that he was in love with another woman but wanted to still be "best of friends" that we will never be best of friends outside our marriage but we can be friendly. This blew my H away.

As for your in-laws...talk to them first and tell them that you would love to see them and spend some time with them but that they would have to promise not to ask for or expect disclosure of any details regarding the state of your marriage as it is too painful at this time and that you feel talking about your H to his parents would be blatantly disrespectful to him. Then the ball in in their court.

If you run into him (not over him ) just smile and say hello and keep walking like you would with an acquaintance like the mail guy or bank teller, or a neighbor you don't know well. Hold your head up and don't look back as hard as that will be to do. Remember Lot's wife in the bible that was told not to look back and did and turned into a pillar of salt?

Your H sounds quite egotistical and narcissistic. Anyone who has had multiple failed business attempts and managed to estrange alot of important people in his life has major issues. Any man who could treat you like he did with the seperation agreement, grinning like a halloween pumpkin, is a major rectum.

Thank God you didn't have children with this man as he is very much a teenager himself. Let me ask you, at what age did he begin drinking regularly?

"No one can make you feel inferior without your consent." -Eleanor Roosevelt.
M-42, H-42. M-22yrs, together 27yrs, Sep 5yrs.
D-22, S-18
I'm a survivor