Sounds like things are improving, well done. Now, keep up the focus on YOU and YOU having great sex. I bet H is definitely enjoying that.
"I have several times tried to GENTLY remind him that me coming out of my shell sexually would be even easier if he would push himself to come out of his shell romantically. He says he is trying, but I think his idea of being romantic is simply wearing cologne. That and trying to get along is all I have noticed. Maybe he is attempting to be more loving and communicative, but no grand gestures as of yet."
The "several times" cancels the "GENTLY."
Cut the negativity and pointing out what he isn't doing. Criminy. Your tone is energy/romance sapping...
Try this instead. Tell him how hot it makes you any time he does something romantic. If he wears cologne, say, "Yum that makes me want to eat you up. It reminds me of when you showed up with cologne and flowers to take me out to romance with with dinner and wine. That made me so horny I had to cross my legs and pulse them together before the first course was over to keep from going crazy."
Focus on the positives. Let him see that giving you what you want gets him what he wants.
With respect to the smooth business... How about asking H to shave you in a bubble bath with wine and candles? and/or tell him anytime he wants you smooth, he just needs to take you to an appropriate salon and tell them exactly what he wants to see?
