Fantastic that you are committed to making your marriage work. As transformer has pointed out, DBing feels very counter-intuitive, but it does work. Read and re-read the success stories for hope.
You sounds like a really strong person- really gutsy and open. For me, DBing is the hardest thing I have ever had to do, but it's making me a better and stronger person than I was.
Keep posting and getting feedback. And no thinking about OW at all- you are the greener grass here!
OD
Walk on, walk on, with hope in your heart. And you'll never walk alone.
