I have no issue with holding up my part, initiating, nor with vibing different things, different times. That was how I approached our R earlier on & then got confused with the lack of reciprocity.
In the last 10 plus months I have come to the realization that H is the guy in the bar who doesn't signal an interest. It would behoove me now as it did when I was young to pass that guy by and move on. H is like pulling up a bar stool & making an effort to meet that guy, see why he isn't interested then trying to get past the reason and get him motivated. Maybe the guy just wants a drink, maybe he has a girlfiend, maybe I'm not his type. What I've done is sit down next to the guy and find out that his favorite color is red and that he's not that attracted to me in general, then showed him my red lace bra just to get his attention. Maybe he'll take me home but the general interest isn't there. I've been more "womaned up" in the past 6 months than in a long time. I have no idea where it will lead and that is ok.
Sexual experience probably does play a role. GP and NOP are both men of the world and I'm sure it helps.
