I don't think scripture should ever be used as a club to beat somebody with. That way lies hypocrisy, as you point out. (OTOH, on a day-to-day level, I doubt any one of us feels the need to be *perfect* before bringing some sub-par behavior to our partner's attention .... otherwise how would any of us ever get the friendly 2 x 4s we need?)
If he respects the bible and tries to conform his life to the principles therein, it would be very interesting to know if he is aware of this passage and how he sees it relating to your marriage. He seems (by his actions) to have zero respect for your needs and reasonings about your sex life ... I wonder how he would respond to a directive from a "higher authority"? As far as how you would go about that in a non-accusatory way, I don't know. Although I'm sure you're creative ....
"Show me a completely smooth operation and I'll show you someone who's covering mistakes. Real boats rock." -- Frank Herbert
