Charcoal & Dreama, hope you don't mind me stepping in here....
Quoting Dreama: I am more confused now after reading what everyone posted than I ever have been.
That's OK. Confused is good! It means you are still open to other possibilities. Best thing for you now is to not feel pressured into taking action in one direction until you can search deep in yourself to find the answer of which possiblitiy is best for yourself and your children.
Quoting Dreama: I'm still not sure that I care enough to make it work. I know that I'm not sure I've given it a chance. I can argue and scream and fight with the best of them. But when it comes to letting someone know that I'm wrong or don't know I can't do it. I'm not sure that I can let Floyd in any more, you know self-preservation.
In the end, its not a really about whose right or wrong ... its about getting what you want in life - that's self-preservation! Could what you want be - to go through life being happy living with Floyd and the children? If there is a possibilty that the answer is yes, then don't worry about if you can make it work or if you can let Floyd back in yet. That's too overwelming at this time. The first step is to make the best of the time you decide to spend together by trying to enjoy their company. The rest can come in time...
Charcoal, it certainly seems you are finding what works for you! ...
Be very proud that you two ladies are working on your marriages & friendships with your H's now.
I wish I would have left my H years ago!!! He said it also. We wasted alot of time. My kids went through alot of crud with mom & dad. They are okay and they always felt loved & cared for but gee if H & I had really committed to renewing our friendship years ago.....oh well. Anyway hope you both are doing well, Mat & Floyd also. I just had lunch with my daughter. We laughed alot. Her dad called and we actually got in a yelling match as to who loved him more! Kip Yes It does sound rather mushy, wasn't always that way ladies. Thats why I know if the guys hold on, give you some space & peace that it would pay off.
"Those who don't read, have no
advantage over those who can't"
Mark Twain
KAW ~ I'm trying. It's really scary, like walking a tightrope when you're scared of heights, but at least there's a little bit of peace? Something like that? Mat says "thanks" everyday. He's thanking me for trying, he's thanking me for trusting him enough to at least do this much...
It can be so much more, I think??? I hope???
KIP? A fish taco... yummm.... never had one? I never had either til last night . BTW ~ Daughter's ROCK, don't they?
Charcoal, I haven't checked out the just for fun thread in months. Your thread is awesome. Posted the lyrics to my song there. Now I must type my paper. Hope my professor is as entertained by it as my daughter was. My d even gave Mr 3 a bath for me tonight! Sleep well
Kip
"Those who don't read, have no
advantage over those who can't"
Mark Twain
You really helped me to understand how my W might be feeling after we ran into the OM this last weekend. I had been sunk deep into my own feelings and not really open to what she might be feeling.
Reading one of your older posts made me realize that she likely had one of the roughest days of this whole process. When I realized this I tried to reassure her that she was loved and in return was granted a brief glimpse of a wonderment that I will never forget.
I wanted to thank you, if you had not shared yourself here on this board I may never have seen that wonder.
You Rock!!!
Peace Out
Brought to you by a preadapted, preeminent analysis engine, and therein lies the root of all evil.
i'm glad, utterly.... i've been experiencing a little tiny bit of that thing you did for your W. it's not *forgiveness*, it goes beyond that... it's *friendship*, the deep kind.
way back in the day, when my H and I were just courting...
i'd get mad at him and go to this diner and sit under a sign that read
"Good friends forgive our faults. Real friends don't see any."
~like 100% independence, another worthy yet unattainable goal~
