maybe it's just a pillow and i am reading too much into it. i also get a better night's sleep in another room, but ironically, she gets upset when i sleep in the guest room (i only go there if i cannnot sleep, and need to turn the tv on.) that's the confusing part: i get intimace during daylight hours, but nothing when it comes to the bed. yet i saw a sex therapist on tv yesterday, and she said that a couple should have sex every two weeks--which is close to the norm for me. maybe it's i that has the problem. i just don't know anymore. i also agree with you about cuddling at night: it only creates frustration. i just don't know if i am asking for too much. maybe it's me who is the selfish one, but it's just doesn't seem to be natural anymore.
