My walls were so incredibly high. They were built in year 2 of married life when H left me for 2 months to whore around (his words). I never even realised they were there.
You are incredibly strong lady. What books have you read on forgiveness?? This anger thing has got to go. Not that it isn't justified it has to go. If you & Mat don't stay married (not a chance of that) but you have to be his friend. Once I let go of the anger with my H, then I calmed way down I even told him to take OW to Texas with him. He was so hurt & mad & frustrated. Course I would have been crushed. Mat is right make up already. OR make out? You have got to let the fear go. You already know you would be fine on your own. You would survive. Good Grief you are one of the strongest, funniest people I know. Reckless maybe, defiant hell yes! But weak no not a chance. You have got to let the expectations go. Have fun with Mat laugh with him and at him. If he had gone to C alone you would have been curious also. You are still mad at the past. Fugetabout it!!!!! Your both differant now your not the same two people who played games on purpose or not. You are going to have a R with each other because of the kids, just relax. Kip
"Those who don't read, have no
advantage over those who can't"
Mark Twain
