Sorry you are struggling. Perfectly understandable under the circumstances.
Sounds like Missy Ma'am wants daddy to give his blessing to her new car...or boyfriend...or choice of college.
Let me suggest this to you: if you see her like she has shown herself to be recently, as a child who perceives that she failed to receive the love and validation that she wanted as a child, as a child who now struggles to claim that missing love and validation, and who attempts to fill that void as an "adult", and who fails miserably because that kind of love and acceptance can only come from within, then maybe you can let go of your anger and disappointment and instead feel compassion for her. Maybe you can accept that you, nor anyone else, can fill that void for her, and that until she reconciles these issues on her own, that with such limited emotional capacity, this is all she is capable of, this is the best she can do. Maybe then you can accept that this is not the relationship that you want or deserve, and she's not capable of giving you that. The best you can wish for her is that she try to work on herself, and work on finally filling the hole in her heart with love for and acceptance of herself. Maybe she will get there, maybe she won't.
All you can do is let her fly.
In the meantime, you sound like a man who could use an extended vacay to some place warm and sunny, where they bring you little drinks with umbrellas in them, where you spend endless hours drawing pictures in the sand with your toes, and where you start growing those dreadlocks.
