she hugged and kissed the kids relentlessly....I didnt even get a 'hi' until I said 'hi'....nice. I was invisible.
She then left to go to a neighbors party. I asked why no 'hi'? She said..it's over between us, nothing has changed for 5 months...we are just not right for each other. can we talk tomorrow. you need to think about whats best for the kids'
You need to understand this - It's pretty simple. Every single time you disagree with her, it cements her "We're not right for each other" thought process. So she didn't say hi first - Who cares? Does it really matter?
When she told you about it being over, you should just say 'okay - I think it is important to ensure that our kids are well cared for' and leave it at that. No arguing, no disagreeing, no trying to talk her out of it.
You seem to be stuck doing 'more of the same', which is you trying to talk her out of the way she feels. You really need to take the focus off her and put it on yourself.
If you can create a positive and agreeable environment with your W, then you'll find that things will improve greatly - When I gave up trying to talk my W around and just listening and validating, she started to agree with me on a lot of topics which were partially R related. She's not afraid to share most of her thoughts and feelings, because she's used to me not biting her head off or turning it against her. Nothing is really fixed, but it's night and day from the hostility that existed a few months ago.
