Hmmm. Very thought provoking. I would say that I've been working on both self-care and R building, and he has done some things in the R building dept too, but not in the underlying areas, and I think that's where my anxiety is coming in. We're both really good at the on-the-surface stuff. It's what lies beneath that gives me the heebie-jeebies, and I think I am definitely better at that stuff than he is. We are not equally matched in this area.
If I look back at the Mars/Venus stuff, I think this conflict is fairly common...but the mismatch seems to come at my cost--I generally just let it go and it never gets better. Maybe I need to accept that it never will. But I do think that there needs to be some kind of respect for my feelings, and expecting him home more than two nights a week does not seem that unreasonable to me.
My belief system is that if I take care of myself, keep my eyes on what is important to me, I will get there. I guess I need to detach some on this one, but I have to be careful that I don't continue to teach him that it's okay to treat me this way. Any suggestions? :P
