Matilda and PS, I think sleeping in the guest room is best for now. It's nice to have my own space. I've always done my reading and writing in the common areas, and would be frustrated when I couldn't have privacy. I've fixed up the room so that it reflects my needs and interests. I think my W and I having our own rooms and sanctuaries will be helpful to both of us.
I think a return to sleeping together will be a gradual process. She was distant the few nights I did sleep with her.
She's afraid to take the leap of faith and resign. I'm giving her space and autonomy on this issue. I want her to do what she thinks is best and when. I keep telling her that whatever helps her to move forward is the best plan.
You're certainly right about the range of emotions. Things have been turbulent lately.
I'm not sure yet about New Years Eve. I'm so weary of spending time with her. I'll play it by ear. I don't want to go if she can't be in the proper spirit, or if I'm not going to be treated well.
My deliberate manner drives my W nuts. She wants everything done now, and all problems solved now. She wants me to approach things like her.
I'm still reading my conflict management skills book. It's helping me to keep my ground, to think about what's important to me, rather than just focus on meeting her needs, and to recognize that her proposals are just a starting point. The book is also helping me to not get too caught-up in her directives, but to focus on what it is she desires, and help her achieve that without compromising what's important to me. This means I have to practice saying no, offering alternatives, and tolerating disapproval.
CL
CL 53 W 54 M 20 yrs. 03'-09' Separation + Old Patterns + GAL 10-14' Piecing
"The Master allows things to happen. She shapes events as they come."
